When I left the Cluster, I swore to myself that I would act as an average personage, a resident of the Republic and nothing more. Time and again I reminded myself that once I was free, my royal blood would count for nothing, and that I should hide it. I certainly did not think I would count on it to save me from problematic situations. But I fear I have done exactly that, and in dong I have caused harm that may not be mended. It was a mistake I will endeavor never to make again.
We have made port at an agricultural planet, Mandragaard. Having frown tired of seeing nothing but bulkheads and the inside of storage containers for weeks on end, I made my way to the market to get some air. I planned on taking a leisurely stroll to sightsee, but my plans were destroyed by two blaster shots that rang through the crowd, and the chaos that followed. I jerked my head, startled, and saw Kaos on the ground with a blaster drawn. Across from her was a man; unconscious from a new blaster would in his shoulder. My eyes took in the scene – the man’s purse was open and there was a handful of credits clumsily hidden in Kaos’ hand. Apparently she believed the crowded market a ripe filed for honing her skills in picking pockets, which seemed as effective as her healing skills. Security guards were approaching, and I acted without thought, pulling my new shipmate from the ground and urgently ordering her to run. I though, I now realize, that my diplomatic skills and status as a Hapan Royal would be sufficient to deal with the guards. I was gravely mistaken.
Why I exposed myself to help Kaos I do not know exactly. Aboard the ship she was the only one save myself who was willing to tell her story. Perhaps I felt some kind of bond with her for that. Perhaps I didn’t want to loose what mechanical skills she had learned over the last few days. No matter now.
The guards came, and I searched my mind for whatever would lead them furthest away from Kaos. I told them a Twi’lek had robbed the man and shot him, not knowing there was only one such being registered to be on the planet. Their questioning became unfriendly as I balked at identifying the woman as the thief. Without going into uncomfortable detail, I sent the woman to prison to avoid a closer look being taken at my person, origins, and possessions. Had my brother not intervened, perhaps I would have been dragged off for questioning regardless.
I feel as a coward, to use others so. And now an innocent is paying the toll for my fear. Upon further reflection, it occurs to me that there is another self-deception under which I have labored. Aboard the ship, I did not hesitate to tell others details about my past, and when we made port I brazenly appeared in the market with my only valuables so conspicuous, they might as well have been on display. I mistakenly believed that, once I was free of the Consortium, all would be well. I thought I could start a new life, safe as my distance from home increased. This was a dangerous mistake, and while I did not pay the price directly, I feel the burden of guilt settling upon me. My conscience is uneasy, the face of a woman I do not know haunts me.
When I re-boarded the ship, I constructed a wallet for the rainbow gems that I could fasten to myself under my robes. I am loath to give one up this early in the journey, but they are in some ways a weight on me. I thought to gain security… but no matter. Perhaps I can part with one in order to save the Twi’lek and soothe my conscience. Perhaps my greed and send of self-preservation will be too great and I will be unable to part with my only remaining wealth. One thing is certain; I have come out of this incident a more careful individual.
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